Chronic Back Pain, Faith, Struggling

A New Hope Arises…

I don’t even know how to write what I want to write.

I don’t even know how to say what I want to say.

My words just aren’t good enough.  Not for this.

I could write from here until my life comes to a close,

and it would never fully encapsulate

the measure of gratitude I feel in my heart for the Lord…

…for what He’s done…

…for how He’s shown me, once again,

that He is right here by my side,

even though He doesn’t even have to show me at all…

I didn’t earn that.  I don’t deserve that, and yet even still, here He is letting me know.

I had an appointment today with a new chiropractor.  I was feeling some heavy doses of guilt over it too, because I loved my other one, and he was also a family friend.  It’s just that I was not making any real progress there.  I would hit rock bottom, he’d pull me back from there, my progress would plateau, and then we’d repeat.

So yes, after many prayers said by both me and those in my prayer corner, I decided it was time to give this guy a try.

Now, when I say that God was not quiet about letting me know that He’d led me here, that is a severe understatement. 

As soon as I walked in, I was met with Christian music playing on the overhead and Bible verses on display throughout his office.  Never…let me try that again…NEVER in my entire life have I walked into a doctor’s office, dentist office, what have you, and been greeted with such an openness about their Christian faith.  I’m sure that there are many who would like to explain all of this away, but that’s a God thing right there, guys…no messing around.  How could that ever possibly be anything else?

To make a long story short about this visit.  This guy is telling me things I’ve never been told before.  He’s already discovered things that no one else has ever discovered before (not my primary, not the specialists, not the double round of physical therapists).

I’m so grateful…

…so incredibly grateful…

to know what’s going on…

…to know that my pain and constant discomfort have been validated…

…to hear that this is all fixable…

…that I don’t have to do the rest of my life like this…

…that I don’t have to worry about this as I grow older…

 

I can’t even begin to put all of this into words, but praise the Lord again, for He knows my heart…He sees me…He knows better than even I how I am feeling toward and for Him.  Yes, even in this…even in the very expression of my gratitude…God is helping me.

From the sounds of it, I have a bit of a road ahead, but I’m fine with that.  This road has a purpose.  It has a destination…and it is a road that I will gladly travel…Even if I were to find that healing was not to come from this, though I really do believe it will, I will gladly travel this road, because I know that my God has led me here.

Thank You, Lord…So very very much for this day…for filling me with hope for my back.  It is something I have not known or felt in such a long, long time.  Thank You for leading me to that office today.  Thank You that there is a plan in the making for my road to recovery.  Thank You for Your healing…because I know that even if physical healing were not to be a part of Your plan here on earth, it will be so in Heaven.  I really do believe that You have plans for my full healing through this chiropractor, and I thank You for that, but I want You to know that I trust You wherever You lead me.  My life is Yours, and my plans I fully surrender, for I know that mine could never be better than Your own.  I love You, Lord, with all of my heart and soul.  Thank You for the healing and transformation You have already filled me with spiritually and emotionally along this journey.  My relationship with You is far deeper and stronger than it ever was at the start of all of this, and for that, I would do this all again if it meant it was the only way for us to have what we have now.  Lord, I pray for Your healing, I pray for Your power and plan to work through this man’s mind and hands for me.  All my plans I give to You.  I am solely in Your Hands, and I love You with all of my heart.  Your Will be done.  In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

 

 

*Featured Image Via Pixabay

Kay Kathleen

I write about my life's core: Jesus & my faith, my family, and the struggles I have met along the way. I figure...I hope...that if exposing my life and it's lessons learned can encourage even one person, this blog and all the hours I have spent behind this computer will have been more than worth it.

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1 Comment

  1. […] still remember how much hope I had when I first started going to my new chiropractor.  A friend of mine, who also had back issues, […]

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